We haven’t dated in, like, two years, so it’s getting more than a little creepy to continue to get flirty texts from you every month or so. And the surprise gifts on Valentine’s Day and my birthday sent to my office … Yeah, that’s not cute — that’s creepy. I said my goodbye for good two years ago, and I’ve since ignored your texts hoping that they’d die down. Since you can’t seem to take “no” for an answer, and getting ghosted for TWO WHOLE YEARS hasn’t been enough to quell your unrequited affection, I think I’m going to have to escalate this into a legal issue. I just wish you didn’t force me to come to this point.

I Saw You is an anonymous “man on the street” column. Email your rants and raves about co-workers or any badly behaving citizens to [email protected], or send to 380 S. First St, San Jose, 95113. Submissions should stick to about 100 words.